May 17th...

Do you ever just kinda wonder why people who have hurt you decide to try and get their say in whatever you are doing in your life that they don't approve of? I honestly don't understand why they care so much, I mean, it's like, you've hurt me before, so why do you give a care what choices I decide to make?

Ah..

Today was a great...

For a while.

It's just frustrating when people have the ability to just say one little thing and just ruin your good day. I don't understand how we give people such authority over our emotions, like its just like...why do people do that? Why don't we give the control over how we feel to God instead?

I don't know.

I am worrying.

Worrying about the future.

Thinking about things from all different points of views.

I am considering so many things recently.

Its like, I bet this could have happened it that didn't happen. or like, If I wasn't doing this with my life, maybe I'd do that. or also, what if I am really not good enough?

Lately I've been thinking a lot about switching schools. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my school so much, and it has changed me a lot...it's just..I really want to do theatre..like...that is my life. That's what I would like to pursue in the future...and I hate to say it, but sometimes I feel like you get parts in plays or musicals or places on the sports teams based on what you MAKE of yourself at the school. Like its about politics kinda. I wanna go to public school, to see how good I really am...and if I am able to go to a different school and get a main part and also, I'd like to be able to try and be a light somewhere, and to share the joy God has given me, with other people. I just wish I could go to both schools at once.

I just don't know what to do anymore.

Agh.

Rough day...