Todayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Today it is May 31st, 2010.

Wholly cow.

I still can't believe I've already completed my sophomore year of high school.

It's pretty cool, not going to lie.

Right now, it is 9:20 p.m. on a Monday night.

I'm still finishing up some packing for Europe--I leave for a 9 day European excursion on Thursday--and making sure I am prepared since this is my first time internationally travelling alone.

Currently, I'm watching The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian....this movie is super intense. All the battles, talking animals, castles...I'm like so into it.

So today, I went to the mall. Well, two different malls. Anyways. I went and got some different things I needed for Europe up in Hawthorne, then headed down to Gurnee and bought some marvelous purple flip flops from Old Navy. Seriously, they've got the best and sturdiest flip flops ever. Anyways, then I headed to Gurnee Mills and spent a lot of time in Forever 21, as usual. I am proud to say, I bought my very first ever pair of "rompers" today. Floral, of course. And, to accompany this outfit, I had to buy a pearl headband. Then, I bought another pair of jeans for Europe.

Tommorow my boyfriend, Jon, is taking me out to dinner. No idea where or what time. But I'm all for it, considering he's been in the city for four days. I haven't really told you about Jon, have I?

Where to start. Well we've only been dating since May 15th, but I like him a lot. He's really sweet and super laid-back, which is nice because I'm pretty laid-back usually too. He likes theater, which is good because I LOVE theater. He's pretty outgoing and easy to talk to, you just have to give him a chance. He likes swimming and he really likes kayaking too, in fact, Thursday afternoon he took me kayaking with our friend Brett. He enjoys hockey, which is funny because I grew up with hockey, cause my brother played it for like YEARS. He also loves Jeeps and horses, which is also funny because I want a Jeep for my first car and I grew up with horses. Even better, his favorite food is fettucine alfredo and ironically I make a BEAST fettucine alfredo.

Anyways, I'm tired of typing and facebook chat is calling my name...

Love,

Kristen.

It's the end of school. Tomorrow is my last day as a sophomore. In the fall, my life will be completely changed. I will be an upperclassman. I will be the example for the youngsters. It's been a fun ride this year. Sophomore year is the greatest. I've had my ups. My downs. But who hasn't? Life's a roller coaster, right?

It's always bittersweet to end a great school year. But it just makes you want to make the next year even better.

Next week I'm going to Europe too.

Hope I can experience some pretty amazing things there.

Anyways. I don't really know what to say.

I'm at a loss of words, for once in my life.

Actually...Dear Self,

If you get married and have children, specifically a daughter, worry about her and care for her...but most importantly, trust her, and trust that you have raised her with enough sensibility and smarts to handle herself.

May 17th...

Do you ever just kinda wonder why people who have hurt you decide to try and get their say in whatever you are doing in your life that they don't approve of? I honestly don't understand why they care so much, I mean, it's like, you've hurt me before, so why do you give a care what choices I decide to make?

Ah..

Today was a great...

For a while.

It's just frustrating when people have the ability to just say one little thing and just ruin your good day. I don't understand how we give people such authority over our emotions, like its just like...why do people do that? Why don't we give the control over how we feel to God instead?

I don't know.

I am worrying.

Worrying about the future.

Thinking about things from all different points of views.

I am considering so many things recently.

Its like, I bet this could have happened it that didn't happen. or like, If I wasn't doing this with my life, maybe I'd do that. or also, what if I am really not good enough?

Lately I've been thinking a lot about switching schools. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my school so much, and it has changed me a lot...it's just..I really want to do theatre..like...that is my life. That's what I would like to pursue in the future...and I hate to say it, but sometimes I feel like you get parts in plays or musicals or places on the sports teams based on what you MAKE of yourself at the school. Like its about politics kinda. I wanna go to public school, to see how good I really am...and if I am able to go to a different school and get a main part and also, I'd like to be able to try and be a light somewhere, and to share the joy God has given me, with other people. I just wish I could go to both schools at once.

I just don't know what to do anymore.

Agh.

Rough day...